How to Use a Strap-on: A Beginners Guide for Women

(This is a guest post) Discover how to have better sex with strap-on's. Read our beginners guide to learn how to use a strap-on, where to buy a strap-on and the best strap-on tips for women!


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Close your eyes, now picture a strap-on: picture what it looks like, how it’s used, who is using it.

Now answer honestly, was the picture that came to mind a badly made lesbian porn film?

Strap-ons are often thought as equipment for porn films but that is where I am going to stop you, strap-ons can be fun and incredibly pleasurable for both parties if used in the ‘optimum’ manner.


In this article, I’ll be giving you some tips and tricks to get the most out of your little (or big) friend.



Firstly, find your dildo

Dildo’s are a staple in the toybox and there are so many out there, so find your perfect dildo.

Most strap-on harnesses will fit any dildo that has a base to it, so don’t limit yourself.

Check out different girths, lengths, materials, shape; it is entirely your choice which dildo to use, remember comfort is key, so start small and work your way up.

The best dildo material for strap-on use are silicone as these are smooth, flexible and robust. However, you can experiment with latex or jelly rubber.

I would stay away from glass and metal because these don’t have the flexibility and can cause discomfort or injury.

Once you’ve decided on the type of dildo, it’s now time for specifications, how girthy do you want it? (Basically the circumference) How long do you want it? Do you want it to be realistic or just smooth and slim?

Take your time and do your research, when it comes to the penetration, you’re going to want to be comfortable.


Click here to find your perfect dildo!


Related: The Ultimate Guide to the Best Sex Toys for Women


Secondly, move onto the harness

Most harnesses are fabric with adjustable leg and hip straps. Believe me one size will fit all but here’s something people don’t talk about, chafing!


If you’re completely naked wearing fabric straps on your legs and thrusting, they can chafe and rub on your skin.

Remember comfort is key, I cannot say it enough!

With most strap-ons, you’ll receive a variety of rings so you can use different sized dildos with ease.

At the back of the pouch is a little opening that you can slip a bullet vibrator in, so that even if you’re one wearing it, the pouch sits over your vulva and the vibrations offer pleasure to both parties.

Ok, so you’re harnessed up and wielding your penis ready to rock your partners world! Hold up!


Click here to find your ideal harness!




remember, Lubricate! Lubricate! Lubricate!

Get water based lube (especially if you’re using a silicone dildo) and lube up the penis.

This will mean that if your partner is not overly wet, or used to being penetrated, it will allow more comfort and far more pleasure. There is no such thing as too much lube so ladies, create a slip and slide down below.

Related: 6 Tools You Need to Enhance Your Sexual Happiness!

There is no need to go hammering away at the vagina straight away especially if this is a first use.

Have a giggle at how ridiculous strap-ons look on everyone and then start slow.


Ease just the tip in first, adding more if your partner's comfortable.

Strap-ons are equipment that one should start slow with and then add more gumption.

Therefore, don’t be embarrassed about using anti-chafe cream underneath (aka nappy cream) or keeping your underwear on.


Click here to find the right lube for you!



Also try different positions- it may be more comfortable to go on top when starting out.

This is a way of controlling depth and pace of the sex and also allows the woman being penetrated to touch her clitoris. This is something I cannot stress enough-sex should be pleasurable!

There is nothing wrong with playing with your clitoris and using a strap-on, after all most women can’t cum from penetrative sex alone.


So there you go, a beginners guide to strap-on sex.

Women should be comfortable using all the toys in the toy box and strap-ons may even become a staple.

There is so little in terms of LGBT+ sex education and even less in regards to toys!

So I hope this handy guide gave you so pro-tips and got you enthused about strapping up and well, diving in!

Click here to find your perfect strap on!

Click here to find a lube that suits your flow!



Guest Blogger Biography

Ms Belle BonBon is a blogger and recent history graduate, who writes about pinup fashion, lifestyle and relationships and all things geek culture! She can often be found with her nose in a book and a pencil in her hair, red lips and sipping earl grey.

If you wish to know more, hop over to her blog msbellebonbon.blogspot.co.uk or stalk her on Instagram and Twitter at @msbellebonbon.